One night, my parent’s sat me down.
“Michele, we have exciting news.” Guarded curiosity.
“Dad has been offered a new job.” Okay, good for him, I guess.
“It’s in Kansas.” But we live in Indiana?
“And we are moving at the end of summer.” ……
I had never been filled with so much grief. My life, my perfect teenage life, was over. I was being ripped away from the only life I knew. I was going to have to live my senior year, the year that is supposed to be the best, without the things that made up my life. I fell into a depression fast and hard. How was I supposed to say good-bye to everything, to everyone? In all honesty, those final days rushed by so quickly that only bits and pieces stand out. Everything is blurred by tears and anger.
And so we moved.
(As a bit of a side note, because I have mentioned her much more then I originally planned, I am happy to tell you that Ande and I were able to make amends before I moved. She wrote me a letter (she is an amazing writer) and we were able to forgive one another, hugging and crying in the middle of our school’s hallway.) Now, back to the story:
I came to the new school not looking to make new friends. I was going to be there a year, what would I need friends there for? After all once I graduated, I would go back to Indiana for college. At least that was the plan.
I glided through fall semester in a fog. My parents, knowing how important drama was to me, had arranged for me to be a part of the new school’s fall musical; even though parts had already been casted.
It wasn’t the same, they didn’t have the same passion or discipline as my old theatre troupe and so once it ended I crawled back into myself and just focused on surviving until Christmas break.
Having noticed me falling deeper and deeper into a depression, for my Christmas present that year my parents bought me a plane ticket back to Indiana. I was beyond elated and so focused on getting to December that I didn’t notice much else around me. In fact, I had a tendency to bury myself into an AP Chemistry book at every opportunity.
And that is how I was found one day in my new school’s library by a boy named Joey. He was very outgoing and plopped himself down in the chair right next to me oblivious to the fact that I was not only ignoring him but trying to make it very clear that I wanted him to leave me alone. After all, Taylor and I were going to make a long distance high school relationship work. (Please, don’t hurt yourself rolling your eyes people.) Turns out, he wasn’t there to hit on me, but instead to recruit me for this class I had never heard of called Forensics. He explained to me what forensics was about and how I would be able to perform a prepared monologue in front of judges. He really thought I would enjoy it since I was so into acting and not really impressed with the school’s drama program.
I wasn’t buying it.
Well, at least not until he told me that it would count as my speech credit, which meant I wouldn’t have to take speech. Okay, now I was convinced. So we headed to the counselors office to rearrange my Spring semester schedule. I had to make some sacrifices, most notable of which was dropping my advanced government class and switching to a ‘regular’ government class. I wasn’t super thrilled, but decided that it would be nice to have an easier class in my schedule (or at least that is what I told myself in order to make the schedule work). So Forensics took the place of Advanced Government during 5th period and just plain Government replaced my former 1st period speech class. I was now excited for the first time all semester for something that didn’t revolve around Christmas break.
The rest of the semester came and went without any other notable happenings and after almost missing my flight to Indiana I found myself sitting on a plane headed back to where I thought I had left my life. It was a good trip and I spent every waking moment with either friends or Taylor. To be honest, looking back I think I did a pretty good job of balancing between the two.
However, by the end of it I had to come to terms with something that had been nagging me the entire time. I was going to go back to Kansas and I was never going to see any of these people again. I’m so thankful that my parents allowed me to make that trip. Being able to go back, and see how life was continuing without me (and how my new life was starting to come together without them) allowed me the kind of closure I really needed. Despite this, Taylor and I would continue to pretend for about another month, but eventually we were forced to admit to each other what we had already come to terms with personally; we were over.
I returned from that trip defeated, exhausted but with a better outlook. I had come to the realization that it was okay for me to make my new life and enjoy it. Of course before that could happen I had to make it through my 1st period Government class.
Ugh! I was so bummed heading to that class. It wasn’t the class I wanted to be in, but I kept reminding myself it was necessary in order to hopefully be able to get acting back into my daily life.
So, I plopped down in the first chair I came to and once again buried myself into my AP Chemistry book and waited for class to start.
What the heck just hit me in the face?
I look down and see a pen cap lying neatly in the crease of my book.
Where did this come from?
I picked it up and held it out in front of me curiously staring at it until something brought me out of my little world.
“Dude, you hit the new girl!!”
I looked up startled; someone had thrown this at me?
I scan the kids in front of me and spotted the culprit. He was smiling at me, a mischievous grin on his face and a sparkle in his eyes, daring me to retaliate.
And I did.
I married him.